Motivational Speaker

I've been doing some serious thinking...




while Stella's been slowly going insane.

My girl has been going stir crazy, what with being laid off and then being sick for the 5 weeks after Thanksgiving... and it's been rubbing off on Stella & I. So, for the sake of everyone's sanity, I grabbed my fave stuffie of the moment (my Big Ass) and settled in for some deep thinking on how to jump start my girl's career search and the next step of our adventures here in GooberStan.

I must thank Maggie & Mitch for the gift of the Big Ass. They bestowed him upon me when I was on my cross-country roadtrip last spring, and he's been a faithful companion as I mine my deep thoughts.

I find that the more I chew and cuddle my Big Ass, the more clarity I have.

It may not look like it, but I'm really working the little grey cells here.





When I'm in this position I almost have Stella fooled that I'm in an unbreakable trance. She usually doesn't mess with me once I reach my "zone."





After one last bite to the Big Ass (eliciting a very satisfying fart sound from him) I am ready to spring my motivational moves on my girl.

My girl doesn't know it yet, but I'm gonna light a fire under her to get her on the path to a job she loves and to living in a place where we will all flourish. (Smalltown Kansas has served its purpose, but is NOT where we want to stay.) I may not be a card-carrying motivational speaker, (and I don't live in a van down by the river), but I got my girl to finish her thesis. I can get her to find a job. (By the way, do you like my devious face?)

Goober love,

Stanley

Bout Time

I've been doing some pondering... It's time for some serious changes here in GooberStan. Don't mean to be so cryptic, but I'll let you in on the secret once I get my girl on board. (See Grammie? I'm still using the very snuggable blanket you made me.)

Goober love,

Stanley

Stella On Demand

I've had a request... nay, a DEMAND, from the mama of Joe Stains for more Stella photos. Evidently she's been jonesin' for a Stella fix. (I'm crushed, Mama Stains.) By popular demand, here are some photos from a little over a month ago at a meeting of the GooberStanian Snasslin' Association (GSA). Enjoy. [For those of you who don't remember, Snasslin' is a combination of Snuggling and Wrasslin' - with a little Brazilian Street Fighting thrown in.]

We usually start out meeting head to head...

but we eventually end up booty to booty.

In between we end up doing a little synchronized... well, synchronized something.

Here's where it starts to get interesting.

I had her pinned for awhile, but then the little booger oozed out from underneath me.

Time to make another move...

I've got you... almost... where I want you, Stella! (imagine my evil laugh here)

C'mON! Say uncle, you little goobette.

Maybe if I go for a direct delivery wet willy.

Nahhh. Stella HATES wet willies.

The rest of these photos are pretty much just me taunting Stella...

... and Stella going for my jugular.

Then it's time for our cool down, and the conclusion of another successful meeting of the GooberStanian Snasslin' Association.

Mama Stains, if I could figure out a way for you to mainline Stella from Arizona then I'd be all for it. Until that time comes, I hope this fix was enough for now.

Goober love,

Stanley

Random Oregon

Blame our girl. That's all I have to say about why we haven't been posting or visiting our friend's blogs! Just remember, she's the one with opposable thumbs. 'Nuff said. (Would these faces lie to you??)

As a peace offering I give you a photo of one of Portland's most famous residents ~ one with whom my girl spent copious amounts of time ~ the signature voodoo doll donut from Portland's VooDoo Doughnuts! He's covered in chocolate, filled with very blood-like raspberry goo, and comes with his own pretzle "needle" for the purpose of torturing him before he is devoured one bite at a time! (What can I say? My girl likes her donuts!)

But hey. We promised to reveal the mystery friends from Dogs With Blogs my girl got to see and maybe this sweet terrier mug will give you a clue...

Clue number 2 ~ a certain psycho dog in Oregon...

Clue number 3 ~ mellow slug dog in the same house...

If you have not yet figured it out, then maybe this photo will enlighten you. We made an impromptu visit to Moco, Foley, and Dawson and their hooman mama (and Peanut & Flash's Grammie)!!! I have been in love with Grammie ever since my buddy Wally the Corgador brought her to my attention over 2 years ago. Even though she already has 2 granddogs in Flash & Peanut (hi, Flash & Peanut!), she adopted me along with Wally as her honorary granddogs, and my girl went to meet her without bringing me along for the ride! My girl said that Grammie is just as lovable as I always imagined and that they talked about me the ENTIRE time they spent together. (As it should be.) Grammie, I'm sorry you were disappointed that I was not with my girl. She SO does not understand our bond!

The impromptu stop at Grammie's house occurred on the way to the Oregon Coast. My girl was taking our buddy, Noah, to see the Pacific Ocean for the first time, and wouldn't you know, it was the first day of bad weather they'd had all season! Pelting rain and 50-80 mph winds! Oooo Baby!

Just a bit of Oregon and movie trivia here. My girl actually got to see Haystack Rock. It's the big dark thing in the photo below. For those of you who are fans of the movie The Goonies , you'll recognize it!

Since this post has devolved from the reveal of my girl's mystery visit to Grammie's house, let me just share a few more random Oregon tidbits with you from my girl's visit. My girl found out that the Portland Zoo had a baby elephant living there and she just HAD to go see him. She was so transfixed (she took over 30 photos and more than a few vids) she wanted you to see how cute he is. His name is Samudra (Sam for short), and he captured my girl's heart. I say, if she loves him so much why didn't she bring him home? If you're a baby elephant freak like my girl, please go to the link above to the Portland Zoo for even better photos and vids of the cute little pachaderm.

Go ahead and say "Awwww." You know you want to.

Now this last landmark was brought to my girl's attention by none other than Bogart's mama, Lulu. I don't know if it appears in the book, Roadside America, but it should. Do you remember when the husband of figure skater Tanya Harding and a friend of his decided to travel out East to whack (literally) on the knee of rival figure skater Nancy Kerrigan? This is the dumpster where police supposedly found the weapon in Portland. Amazing... huh? You can get the whole story here if you're interested.

Stella and I hope you have enjoyed this wacky and weird travelogue. We apologize for the appalling lack of dog photos and hope to remedy that for you in our next post. Grammie, thank you for allowing my girl to come bask in your glow even if I wasn't with her to pave the way. You're the best!

Goober love,

Stanley

Bogart & Lulu & Buzzards... OH MY!

My girl is FINALLY getting her booty in gear to share about her trip to...

as my GooberStanian emissary to visit my good bud, Bogart Handsome Devil!



My girl's accomplice in her adventures in Portland was my fave 17-year-old amigo, Noah. (He & I are cool, but in Stella's mind, he's her nemesis and she goes OFF whenever she sees him.) Luckily for him I trust him to roadtrip with my girl when I can't.




He's a real musician (not just a wannabe), and made sure to sample some of the finest gui-tars in Portland while in town.

My girl was all a-tingle about meeting Bogart and his mama, Lulu! This photo only begins to illustrate the beauty of Dogs With Blogs and how much you can grow to love someone you just met! (Noah was surprised to find out that Lulu and my girl had only messaged and emailed back & forth before that night. He said it seemed like they had been good friends for years. He also said that Lulu is one of the coolest adults he has EVER met.)

My girl wanted to spend as much time with Lulu and Bogart as possible, and did, but first things first. As the GooberStanian emissary to BogartLand, my girl made sure to pay proper tribute to Bogart with our humble offerings of friendship... namely, this stuffed buzzard that made a comforting farting noise. (Do you think Bogart was intrigued by the buzzard or my girl's effervescent love for him?)

It did not take long for Bogart to settle into a comfy relationship with his buzzard.

My girl has always been fascinated with the thickness of Bogart's eyeliner. You may be seeing several of this type of photo... just sayin'...

While this is MY blog and this post is not, technically, about my girl's fetishes, she is also obssessed with Bogart's juicy schnoz to an extreme degree.

Such a happy boy!

My girl noticed that Bogart is a REAL mama's boy. As long as Lulu is close by then Bogart is happy.

Here Lulu is explaining the benefits of the Chuck-A-Duck.

Bogart didn't require a lot of convincing.

That boy is a consummate camera slut!

Once he was a aware of the camera it was a FULL-ON fashion spread.

This photo is a two-fer: notice the close up of the great eyeliner AND the juicy schnoz!

Now this is the really interesting part. My girl has been promising Bogart her Atomic Booty Scratches (A.B.S.) for years. Here she is trying to ease him into the process. (It can be quite overwhelming for a dog not accustomed to it.)

As the Atomic nature of the booty scratch began to sink in, Bogart began mumbling like an old man and gave in to the scratching.

Most of my girl's time with Bogie and his mama was spent out on the streets of Portland.

From this photo I think it's evident who encourages Bogart's saucey attitude and joie de vivre!

Since my girl had no navigational copilot with her (as I was home in GooberStan), Bogart was more than willing to take on the responsibility. He was very attentive to Noah's needs.

And of course, Bogart got to experience the added treat of riding with his trusty assistant (and mama).

My girl was eager to show this photo (for my benefit evidently) saying, "Awww! Bogie LOVES his mama!"

It's pretty obvious that these two are TOTALLY connected! My girl is already having withdrawal from them both.

Wish I could have been there myself, Bogie! Thanks for taking care of our girl, man. Stella, Merv & I are STINKIN' glad to have her home! And, she has even MORE to tell about her northwest adventure, and even met some other outstanding and famous DWB celebrities... who could it be??!! Guess you'll just have to wait to find out.

Goober love,

Stanley